I don’t need to watch the hit HBO series Insecure to know what insecurity looks, sounds and feels like–I have front row seats for to my life, all day, every day. That’s not to say that I spend every second of the day dissecting and reflecting on my character defects and comparative ‘drawbacks’. Nonetheless, I do spend enough time to know better.
I know better than the tales of unworthiness that I tell myself. I know better than the judgments about my beauty and body that I feed myself. I know better than to terrorize myself with my terrific imagination and terrifying what-if scenarios. I know, I know, I know.
Though, in the immortal words of G.I. Joe, “Knowing is half the battle”. What, then, is the other half? Believing. *Journey voice* “Just a small town girl, living in a lonely world…” (She took the red-eye plane going to Maaaauuuuiiiiii.)
The journey from knowing to believing is not for the faint of heart, my friends. The twists. (Ooh!) The turns. (Aah!) The heartbreaking/ego-shattering/limited belief-collapsing travails – and triumphs – that shake us to our very core. (@#$%^&*!) Yet, it’s in these core-shaken places where we are forced, again and again, to confront our inner-knowing of who we truly are.
“So God created man in His own image; in the image of God He created him; male and female He created them.” ~Genesis 1:27-28, NKJV
Thus, when my humanity – toward myself – is severely tested and I feel twisted, turned and torn, it is then that my Divinity within arises and the God in me is reborn. (Hallelujah!) At the times when I see myself as least valuable and most unlovable, God, through the Holy Spirit, reminds me of my value in Him and of His love for me.
As I allow myself to feel the warmth of God’s love and receive His superior validation, I then steadily recall the truth that my true self is not lacking in any way, despite what my human self may do, think and say. What’s more, in the Spirit, flesh and in truth, I am one whole being.
So, this I know as true–again. But how do I believe it–for real? Well, as I’m learning, it’s really a matter of believing God.
“Then God saw everything that He had made, and indeed it was very good.” ~Genesis 1:31, NKJV
See, I’ve found that if I take people’s word for my worth, then my value in myself will drop just as soon as they drop me. Even if I try to invest my worth entirely in myself, my stock will still waver due to the volatile nature of my personal insecurities exchange. But(!) when I invest all of who I am in the One who made me, knows me and calls me His own, then – and only then – am I truly secure.
“For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, says the Lord, thoughts of peace and not of evil, to give you a future and a hope. Then you will call upon Me and go and pray to Me, and I will listen to you. And you will seek Me and find Me, when you search for Me with all your heart.” ~Jeremiah 29:11-13, NKJV
If your estimation of your worth is off balance and you could use a new perspective to see just how valuable you truly are, then click the links to find and fellowship with us on Facebook and Instagram. Treasure, that is what you are!